Note: Please read the post titled, "Jesus rode a Harley Davidson" before you read this.
Me: Heya God boy…how is it hangin’?
God: You owe me 700 bucks
Me: Erm…what for?
God: I paid for the beer the last time…
Me: Oh yeah….sure….I acknowledge the fact that I owe you money…(cough, cough)
God: Bronchitis, eh?
Me: Yup. So what else is happening, since the last time we met?
God: Nothing much, the planet still sucks…
Me: Yeah I know….I think you should get some friends…..
God: It’s easy for you to say that…
Me: Whatever. Say, God, you think I can get a girlfriend?
God: I cannot laugh out loud or roll on the floor laughing; it disturbs the ecology of this system.
Me: Erm…..can you tell me the future?
God: What do you want to know?
Me: The future…how is it going to be?
God: You will die.
Me: Yeah I know that…what I meant was, how is the time between now and till my death going to be?
God: That depends on you…I can only tell you the definitive future.
Me: I see that….by the way, do you understand religion now?
God: Nope.
Me: Humanity?
God: What humanity? The only things human on this planet are all the things which are not human...like all the flora and fauna which you guys destroy to make paper to wipe your asses…
Me: Whoa man…chill out…don’t be so angry…
God: Well anger seems to be the emotion of the moment….I see anger everywhere….
Me: Well, me and the boys don’t get angry often…
God: You are one big bunch of drunk losers…that’s why
Me: Sure…each of us is like Robert De Niro in Heat…we’ve lost everything, and we are ready for anything, because we ain’t got much to lose anyway, so you see…we are the other guys…
God: Yeah, right…even the excuse is so lousy….
Me: It was the best I could come up with…ok? So excuse me…
God: Excused.
Me: It’s boring right, this life…
God: You talking to me? YOU talking to me?
Me: I understand…must be really LOUSY to be alone, lonely and in the wrong place…maybe mankind is not ready for you yet…
God: Maybe you are right…..maybe I am not ready for man cruel yet….
Me: Anyway, drink up, your beer is getting warm….
God: You still owe me 700..
Me: Yeah yeah…I know….don’t worry….erm…one last thing…you think I can get a girlfriend?
(Thunder, lightning, hail, pandemonium…the world ends.)
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4 comments:
The world ended? Then what I am doing surfing cyberspace --hmmmm...maybe cyberspace still exists.
I hope you ride a Harley next time for a change along with your girlfriend treating godman the LONG ISLAND ice tea. :)
Because we aint got anything much, we need to try our own to get a girlfriend. if we didn't get it, we didn't lose anything, cause we never had it before. .......... "If it's to be, it's up to me."
Thanks Lubna, Khadar, and ramkiran for the comments.
Lubna - Hey! Long time...How have you been? (All this after the world has ended...maybe cyberspace is the new world, what with people connecting more through chat engines, emails, etc, etc.)
Khadar - LONG SHOT!
ramkiran - Yup. If it's to be, it's up to you. Find me a girlfriend. Please.
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